Hacked by Mahakaal Hax0r &
Ritu Thunderbolt

You bloody muzzies, wait for the day when Lord Shiva comes out of the Kaaba and destroys you all. Remember, the more you provoke me, the more I will harass you.

Allah loves this hack Allah himself has claimed that he loves this hack and that it will not be destroyed like an infidel dog. Fortunately, this hack is sufficiently clothed and will not be blamed if it is a rape.

Take your seat and wear the seat belts, Allah should not be blamed if you roll on ground. Read this hack otherwise Allah burn your ass in hell fire.

Why are Muslims so mindless and stupid?

       Now don’t get me wrong all religious people are complete idiots, without the ability to think for themselves. However one group clearly has the lead in stupidity, “The Muslims”.

       The problem becomes clear when the holy book is authored by an individual that can only be described as: an oppressive warlord, murderer, bigot and a pedophile. You don’t need to be smart to understand that you have found the perfect prescription for pain chaos and suffering.

       The results of this stupidity grab headlines every week, in Islamabad’s red mosk. A handful or morons, that actually believe they have the knowledge and right to imposing their interpretation of gods will on millions of people, created a meaningless blood bath after terrorizing people for months on end, beating up women without burkas, destroying music cds and countless other obscene meaningless acts of intimidation and violence.

       The only thing that can delay the shift is the inbreeding that flourishes in Islamic countries, that generates generation upon generation of stupid sickly and weak offspring. That drags thzis stupid iron age philosophy along with them.

Mecca : The Center of Islamic Stupidity

(Muslim call to adopt Mecca time)

Muslim scientists and clerics have called for the adoption of Mecca time to replace GMT, arguing that the Saudi city is the true centre of the Earth.

One geologist argued that unlike other longitudes, Mecca's was in perfect alignment to magnetic north.

Mecca watch

A prominent cleric, Sheikh Youssef al-Qaradawy, said modern science had at last provided evidence that Mecca was the true centre of the Earth; proof, he said, of the greatness of the Muslim qibla - the Arabic word for the direction Muslims turn to when they pray.

The meeting also reviewed what has been described as a Mecca watch, the brainchild of a French Muslim.

The watch is said to rotate anti-clockwise and is supposed to help Muslims determine the direction of Mecca from any point on Earth.

Promiscuous Women Cause Earth Quakes

"Many women who do not dress modestly ... lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which (consequently) increases earthquakes," Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi was quoted as saying by Iranian media.

Read More: Boob Quake

Tomato, Cucumber & Shari'a
(By Haider Ala Hamoudi)
         On a tip from Zuhair (made famous in my memoir) and given a rare opportunity to actually get to one degree of separation from the members of Al Qaeda, I asked a vegetable seller about cucumbers and tomatoes.

         Buying vegetables in Baghdad, actually all of Iraq, feels like a trip through history. There are people with wooden stands that look as if they have been around for thousands of years, all containing various crates of vegetables. An old and dusty scale sits somewhere near the proprietor, and as vegetables are selected, he places them on the scale, along with some iron weights and announces a weight that always seems to be suspect, as I cannot determine the weight amount, or that it has reached equilibrium as he carries out this operation. As he was doing this, he let it be known he was in the Anbar while Al Qaeda controlled it, and I felt I had to ask him about their alleged prohibition of salad.

Tomato, Cucumber & Shari'a
(By Haider Ala Hamoudi)
       "Yes, yes, he replied." No cucumbers and tomatoes together. Even placing them side by side in these crates would have led at least to a whipping, maybe death. I was puzzled, my brother in law was not. He told me that in fact when he was in Kirkuk the graffiti forbade three things: salads (which in Iraq is basically cucumber and tomatoes), shorts and beauty products for men. This was hard to understand.

       "Look at this," the vegetable seller said to me, holding up a tomato. "What does it look like?"

"A tomato," I said.

"No, it is a tomato, but what does it look like."

       "It looks like a tomato, that's what leads me to conclude it is a tomato. If it looked like a horse, I'd say it was a horse. It does not. It looks like a tomato. It is a tomato." I think I am making a philosophical point, maybe Hume or something, but it's almost 120F outside and I don't want to be dilly dallying asking about Al Qaeda. If the terrorists don't get me, the police might. Hume can wait.

Tomato, Cucumber & Shari'a
(By Haider Ala Hamoudi)
         "Okay," he relents, "what else might it resemble? Notice it is red, like a woman's lipstick. It is soft and round. Get it? It reminds you of a woman's flesh."

         "I see," I said. But I thought, man do you need a wife if you look at a tomato and think that.Then he picked up the cucumber and was about to ask me what I thought it looked like, when I cut him off. That one I could follow better. If a tomato was a woman, I could well assume what a cucumber was.

         "So the idea is that it reminds people of sex, it's the mixing of the man and the woman, the cucumber and the tomato, and unlawful sex at that, and so they forbade it."

Tomato, Cucumber & Shari'a
(By Haider Ala Hamoudi)
         I paused, trying to process all of this. I spend my life reading through books and carefully considered arguments concerning outcomes in Islamic law. Now here I was faced with what appeared to be utter nonsensical, ridiculous stupidity of the highest order, and I had no idea how to react. Ask me about Qaradawi's ideas of female genital mutilation, I can talk. Explain to me how cucumbers and tomatoes in a dish resemble sexual intercourse, and I am at a loss. Finally, a thought occurred to me. I asked "what if you married the two of them?"


         "If I married the cucumber and the tomato and made them lawful partners, would that be okay? Then it's lawful sex," I said. I couldn't believe I was having this conversation.

         "I thought you were a professor. How can a cucumber and a tomato get married? They're vegetables," he replied. And with this sound logic, the conversation soon ended.

The Patient Old Man
A bedouin once came across an old man who was blind and who seemed to be afflicted with various ailments all over his body. It was clear that he was wasting away. He was even paralyzed and was constantly forced to remain in a seated position. The Bedouin hear clearly him saying, All praise is for Allah, Who has kept me safe from ailments with which He has tested many among His creation, and He has indeed preferred me over many among those that He created.

Exclaimed the bedouin. What have you been saved from? By Allah, I think that you have been afflicted with every single kind of ailment!

Go away from me, said the old man, as he raised his head. Do I not still have a tongue with which I can pronounce His Oneness, and with which I can remember Him every single moment? And do I not still have a heart with which I can know Him?

These words of the old man were enough for the bedouin to repent to Allah for his sins and ask Him for forgiveness.

Muslims Offended by Apple Store

Apparently the glass cube shape of the 5th Ave Apple Store entrance resembles the Kaba in Mecca. The report, which was translated by The Middle East Media Research Institute (MEMRI), also finds problems in people referring to the glass cube as the “Apple Mecca,” the store being open 24 hours a day like the Kaba, and because “alcoholic beverages” are served inside at a bar.

As far as building a cube shaped store entrance that’s open 24 hours a day...... Apple’s 100% guilty of doing that. But can a simple glass cube really be blasphemous?

Islamic Toilet Etiquettes
The Islamic faith has particular rules regarding personal hygiene when going to the toilet. This code is known as Qadaahul Haajah.

Issues of laterality, such as whether one uses the left or right hand and the foot used to step into or out of toilet areas, are derived from hadith sources. The only issue which the Qur'an mentions is the one of washing one's hands especially following going to the toilet which is mentioned in verse 5:6.

The Islamic prophet Muhammad specified that one should use an odd number of stones (preferably three) to cleanse the anal orifice after defecation and then proceed to a different location to wash it with water.

Islamic Toilet Etiquettes
Examples of these rules include, but are not limited to:-

1. It is strongly forbidden to make the toilet close to the flowing waters, or to be by a flowing water whilst relieving yourself.

2. It is more preferable to step into the toilet with left leg and step outside the toilet with right leg.

3. One should remain silent whilst on the toilet. Talking, answering greetings or greeting others is heavily disliked.

4. One should not face nor turn one's back on Qibla whilst relieving yourself.

5. When leaving the toilet one should also say a prayer, "Praise be to Allah who relieved me of the filth and gave me relief".

6. Use of toilet paper is acceptable, but washing with water is still needed for purity.

Mohammad and a little Monkey
(Great Islamic Stupidity)
Bukhari, Volume 5, Book 58, Number 188

“Narrated 'Amr bin Maimun”

"During the pre-lslamic period of ignorance I saw a she-monkey surrounded by a number of monkeys. They were all stoning it, because it had committed illegal sexual intercourse. I too, stoned it along with them."

Since when did monkeys start getting married?

Do you really believe that the Prophet (PBUH) encouraged stoning a monkey for adultery?

The Meaning of Nikah in Islam

What exactly does “Nikah” mean?

The word Nikah doesn't exactly mean "Marriage." Let's explore what the word means from the classical Islamic reference books and according to the opinion of recognized Islamic scholars.

From: Dictionary of the Quranic phrases and its meaning; Sheik Mousa Ben Mohammed Al Kaleeby, Cairo, Maktabat Al Adab, 2002.

The definition of "Nikah" is the penetration of one thing by another. Examples would be as in saying the seed in the soil. It also can mean the entwining of two objects one with the other. An example would be saying the trees (embrace) each other, meaning they entwined with one another.

From: Kitab (Book of) Al Nikah: Commentary of Imam Ahmed Ben Ali Ben Hagar Al Askalani, Beirut, Dar Al Balagha, 1986

Linguistically, "Nikah" means penetrating. When it is pronounced "Nokh" it refers to a woman's vagina. It is mainly used in the context of "sexual intercourse." When it was used in reference to marriage it is because sex is a necessity in marriage.

Brain of Muslims

Sexual Perversity of the Muslim Mind

         If anything, the way Muslim men interpret Islam it is more of an offence to them than anyone else, but they are to stupid to realise it. Muslim women have to cover themselves - This suggests that Muslim men are like wild animals, they are perverted and can’t control their evil satanic desires. A Muslim man THINKS he can marry 4 wives and he will get 72 virgins when he dies? lol - Again isn’t this treating a Muslim man as a man-whore, isn’t this degrading his honour. “A muslim women covers herself so she wont get raped” So, Muslim men are rapists, who cannot control themselves, she has to cover herself to protect herself against rapists. So should little girls also have to cover herself, to protect herself from Muslim Pedos?

Safe Sex with Animal

Ayatollah Khomeini's instruction for safe sex with animals

         Is there a proper Muslim way to have sex with animals? Indeed, there is! Guidelines for sex with animals can be found in the writings of Ayatollah Khomeini. Two excerpts from his writings serve to clarify the matter. "A man can have sex with sheep, cows and camels and so on. However, he should kill the animal after he has his orgasm. He should not sell the meat to the people in his own village; however, selling the meat to the next door village should be fine."

Don't the buyers deserve a discount of some kind?

Goats Wear Diapers

Shepherds in the rural western Baghdad neighborhood of Gazalea have been murdered, according to locals, for failing to diaper their goats. Apparently the sexual tension is so high in regions where Sheikhs take a draconian view of Shariah law, that they feel the sight of naked goats poses an unacceptable temptation.

They blame the goats and owner.....lol!!!!

Osama Latif Malik, 18, Caught Sodomizing Neighbor's Goat

The unfortunately named Osama Latif Malik was apparently feeling horny. But instead of finding a nice girl to romance - which is how we do it in this country -- he succumbed to his yearning with a neighbor's goat.

Read More: Spring Man Accused Of Sodomizing Neighbor's Goat

Saudi Arabia have refused to receive Ambassador Akbar Zeb from Pakistan because his name translates into Arabic as “Biggest Penis.”

Yes, that's really what it translates as. Neal Ungerleider over at True/Slant helpfully tells us that Akbar is a common Muslim name that translates to "the greatest", and Zeb is a relatively common Urdu name (??) whose meaning in Arabic is a crude word for male genitals.

Shaykh Abdallah

(Any dialogue is better than none)

         Identify sources, which propagate destructive Messianic ideology and address them, e.g. Lord of the Rings and The Chronicles of Narnia, which can imbue children and teens with the “hate” ethos. For example, in Lord of the Rings, free peoples of the West and North enter an all-out war with the terror-inflicting forces of the South and East, in Middle Earth (Middle East?), for the second time after a thousand-year lapse (crusades?). On the border of the conflict lies the land of Gondor (Palestine?), run by a steward, and awaiting the coming of a king, who is also a healer (Messiah?). Interesting is Saruman (Catholic church?), the leader of a group of priest- or monk-like wizards, who in the previous conflict lead the wizards, but has turned evil, thereby necessitating the new leader, Gandalph (Evangelicals/Masonites/templars/another church?). Also interesting is the steward (Jews?), who fails to accept the new king and dies a pagan death. As we can see, this book promotes a disturbing world-view, made even more disturbing by the fact that it is widely read by teens and young persons.

Stupid Moron thinks:

Middle Earth is Middle East....lol!!!
ROLF...Palestine Is Gondor.
Saruman is Catholic Church.......LMAO.

Stupid Muslim Hijacker

       An Air Mauritania Boeing 737 carrying 71 passengers and a crew of eight was hijacked by a lone gunman brandishing two pistols Thursday evening. The hijacker has been identified as Mohamed Abderraman, a 32-year-old Mauritanian. Mauritania has said the hijacker was a Moroccan from the Western Sahara. Along the way, speaking to the hijacker, the pilot realized the man did not speak French. So he used the plane’s public address system to warn the passengers in French of the ploy he was going to try: brake hard upon landing, then speed up abruptly. The idea was to catch the hijacker off balance, and have crew members and men sitting in the front rows of the plane jump him, the Spanish official said. The pilot also warned women and children to move to the back of the plane in preparation for the subterfuge, the official said. It worked. The man was standing in the middle aisle when the pilot carried out his maneuver, and he fell to the floor, dropping one of his two 7 mm pistols. Flight attendants then threw boiling water from a coffee machine in his face and at his chest, and some 10 people jumped on the man and beat him, the Spanish official said. The hijacker was arrested by Spanish police who boarded the plane after it landed at Gando airport, outside Las Palmas.

Mohammad's Camel Urine Therapy
Narrated Abu Qilaba: "Anas said, "Some people of 'Ukl or 'Uraina tribe came to Medina and its climate did not suit them.

So the Prophet ordered them to go to the herd of (Milch) camels and to drink their urine (as a medicine).

So they went as directed and after they became healthy, they killed the shepherd of the Prophet and drove away all the camels. The news reached the Prophet early in the morning and he sent (men) in their pursuit and they were captured and brought at noon. He then ordered to cut their hands and feet (and it was done), and their eyes were branded with heated pieces of iron, They were put in 'Al-Harra' and when they asked for water, no water was given to them." Abu Qilaba said, "Those people committed theft and murder, became infidels after embracing Islam and fought against Allah and His Apostle.

(Sahih Bukhari, Ablutions (Wudu'), Volume 1, Book 4, Number 234)

Stupid Muslim Tricks
(Saudi Soccer Fatwa)

The Islamic geniuses in Saudi Arabia have ruled that Muslims should not play soccer like the Europeans do because it violates the Prophetic tradition (hadith) against imitating Christians and Jews. The Neanderthal Wahhabi clerics dictate that soccer can only be played if the rules are different from the rest of the world and the players play only to get in good shape to kill infidels in the jihad.

For example:- Do not play in two parts (i.e. halves), but rather in one part or in three parts, so as to be different than the sinful and rebellious, the non-believers and the polytheists.

Read More : Saudi Soccer Fatwa

Source of pigs is Jews
(Fatwa in Egypt)

A new fatwa published in Egypt determines that the source of all the existing pigs in the world is Jews, who were cursed by Allah. The new edict was issued by Sheikh Ali Osman from the Egyptian Waqf ministry.

Due to their Jewish roots, Sheikh Osman says, it is permissible to slaughter all the pigs. The religious scholar was quoted as saying by a Jordanian newspaper that he personally believes the source of the pigs is Jews and thus the consumption of pork meat is banned in Islam.

He added that a person who consumes swine flesh is considered as one who consumed another "impure person." Sheikh Osman said his fatwa is being supported by the heads of al Azhar, but they fear to publicly confirm it. He said he still wait for response from al azhar fatwa committee to get an official approval for his new edict.

Then guess what is the Source of Jackass......The Muslims!!!

Fatwa Against Modeling

A fatwa has been issued by Darul Uloom Deoband, the leading Islamic seminary, against modelling by Muslim women.

The seminary has said exhibiting bodies by Muslim women while modelling is against the sharia.

The fatwa, which describes modelling as un-Islamic, was issued by Mufti Habibur Rehman, Mufti Mehmood Hasan, Mufti Fakhrul Islam, Mufti Zanul Islam and Mufti Waqar Ali of the seminary on Monday.

Fatwa Against Credit Cards

In an economy awash in easy credit, Ottawa's leading imam is definitely swimming against the tide.

Imam Khaled Abdul-Hamid Syed has issued a fatwa against credit cards, even if they are paid off every month.

I conclude that it contains usury ... which is forbidden in Islam, so it should not be used, Imam Syed said in a mass email to members of the city's main mosque.

A fatwa is a religious decision, to tell people what their God loves, and what makes their God Angry with them

Fatwa Against Pets

Dogs are considered unclean under Islamic tradition but, while relatively rare in Iran, some people do keep them as pets. By issuing a fatwa -- a religious ruling -- Grand Ayatollah Naser Makarem Shirazi has sent a clear message that this trend must stop.

Friendship with dogs is a blind imitation of the West, he was quoted as saying in Javan daily. There are lots of people in the West who love their dogs more than their wives and children.

Guard dogs and sheep dogs are considered acceptable under Islamic law but Iranians who carry dogs in their cars or take them to public parks can be stopped by police and fined. The Koran does not explicitly prohibit contact with dogs, Shirazi said, but Islamic tradition showed it to be so.

Fatwa Against Mickey Mouse

Saudi sheikh slams Disney icon as a soldier of Satan, says impure corrupter must be killed according to Islamic law.

Maybe Islamic cleric Muhammad Al-Munajid is just more of a Bugs Bunny sort of guy?

In an interview with Al-Majd Television the sheikh, a former diplomat who once served in the Saudi embassy in Washington, condemned cartoons that endear rodents to their viewers.

Islamic law, he said, sees the mouse as a repulsive, corrupting creature while children today see mice as loveable and "awesome" because of animated shows like Tom and Jerry, and Disney staple Mickey Mouse.

Mickey Mouse has become an awesome character, even though according to Islamic law, Mickey Mouse should be killed in all cases, Al-Munajid tells the interviewer.

The shari'a refers to the mouse as little corrupter, and says it is permissible to kill it in all cases. It says that mice set fire to the house, and are steered by Satan. The mouse is one of Satan's soldiers, he goes on to say."

The Sun Revolves Around the Earth
(Grand Mufti Sheikh Ibn Baaz)

In a 2000 Fatwa titled “The Transmitted and Sensory Proofs of the Rotation of the Sun and Stillness of the Earth”, Saudi Arabian Grand Mufti Sheikh Ibn Baaz asserted that the earth was flat and disk-like and that the sun revolved around it. He had insisted that satellite images to the contrary were nothing but a Western conspiracy against the Islamic world.